Dating rules bullshit
"I feel that you're a massive dick," for example, is an "I" statement, but it probably won't get the job done.
The point of "I" statements is to communicate your feelings in a nicer, more compassionate way that's more likely to be heard, couples therapist Elisabeth Lamotte, founder of DC Counseling and Psychotherapy Center, tells Buzz Feed.
Make sure you don't fall prey to what Orbuch calls "silent dining syndrome" — going out to the same old restaurants and barely talking — by doing genuinely fun, stupid, adventurous things together and continuing to ask questions and learn more about each other.
"Communication is touted as the pillar of relationship protocol, yet few people use this tool effectively," says Winter.
If something is lacking in your partnership, try making the first move to inject it back into things.
"You'll soon discover the entire nature of your interactions shift to the positive," she says.
You've probably heard that "I" statements are important in effective communication and that's definitely true — but only if you use them correctly.
D., relationship expert and author of 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage From Good to Great, tells Buzz Feed.
"Time alone gives partners those vital moments to process thoughts, pursue hobbies, and develop new topics to talk about," she says.
Don't assume you know everything about each other even if you've been together for a long time — instead, ask off-the-wall questions you may never have talked about, like what good memory your partner would use to conjure a patronus.
(Or, you know, if y'all aren't Harry Potter nerds, any of Matt Bellassai's first date questions.) Phones are great and all, but going technology-free every once in a while can really go a long way in making you more available and accessible for your partner, couples therapist Irina Firstein tells Buzz Feed.